I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
