The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
