My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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