You can't motorboat a personality
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
I want to be your penis for a week.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize