Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
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Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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