): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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