Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize
