I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
