If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
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