im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
