In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
