I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
