I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Randomize