what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Randomize