are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
