idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Randomize
