When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
