Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
