Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
