Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(517): View more from Michigan

and trust me i need no booty pop lessons

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(302): View more from Delaware

Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.

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(551): View more from New Jersey

the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit

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(313): View more from Michigan

Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.

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(513): View more from Ohio

There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.

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(915): View more from Texas

Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.

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(805): View more from California

I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options

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