i just wanna soil my oats bro
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
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