shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
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