Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
Randomize