Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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