Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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