I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
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