Welp...herpes.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
