sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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