so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Randomize
