How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize