I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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