You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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