Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
