we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
