He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
