halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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