Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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