But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
