Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize