I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
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