its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
