Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
only if we run a train.
done.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
