I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
