If i come over, it means nothing
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
