No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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