is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
