Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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