this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
We got so high we made milksteak
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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