is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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