Whod you bang
I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
